Monday, July 18, 2011
Project Grown Up: bitch is the new black.
It's really hard to blog about personal things because I don't want to cross the line of what's appropriate to talk about and what's not. The following might seem a little vague, but it's important to me that I express it.
I've recently had an issue come up with one of my jobs and it put in me in an awkward position. Now, that position wouldn't have been so awkward if I was perfectly content asking for things I deserve, but I do. Part of this Project Grown Up has been for me to not only take care of things I need to, but also for me to start to change my mindset when I need to deal with issues like this.
After getting a phone call hearing how things were going to change for the next 3 weeks at work, I froze. I was given no previous notice, and this issue would effect me both time-wise and monetarily. This wasn't right. I am not someone who feels privileged to have things a certain way, don't get me wrong, but after working for the same people for 5 years, you would think they could have the decency to think about how this would effect me.
I hung up and I thought. Was I overreacting? No. Should they have given me some kind of warning over a major change like this? Yes. Do I deserve to get treated fairly? Of course!
Why then was it so difficult for me to call them back, and tell them how this was effecting me, and offer a new, more "fair" alternative to what they told me would happen? The truth is, I am a wimp. In other ways, I am strong, but in demanding things I deserve, I am inexperienced. This is going to change. I did actually make that phone call and they gave me what I asked for, but not without giving me grief about it. Everyone is out for themselves in this world, and if I'm not, then I'm going to get stepped on. I stood up for myself but this is only the beginning. I am done with taking rude remarks from people and thinking, "they don't really know how mean they are being, they are just like that." I am going to stop them and tell them exactly what they just did. I am going to get what I want out of this life because it is my own. No one else will do it for me, and yeah, it might be tough to get used to, but I will get used to it. As Tina Fey so eloquently put it, "Bitch is the new black."